Posts Tagged ‘virus’

Doomsday

Doomsday

Tuesday, July 29th, 2008

If I was the kind of person who walked out of / switched off movies, and lord how I wish I was sometimes, I would’ve been done with this around the hour mark. It fits the mould of the Grindhouse movies, particularly Planet Terror, but like, in a really, really bad, sad, pathetic wannabe British way.

I really don’t want to write what I really think of this movie because I did so and I read it back and I just don’t want the feedback that what I wrote might trigger. That some people might get some enjoyment out of this movie doesn’t bug me. That someone like Neil Marshall can make such a movie and still somehow be regarded as a gem in the British film industry … no matter how much I may try to distance myself from the herdlike mindset of the masses … it still makes me feel ashamed to be alive.

I’m inclined to add somewhere here, “y’know what, it’s just not for me,” but I’m sick of it. I’m sick of it being somehow okay for people to get a kick out of shit like this while I and others get regarded as sickeningly weird for, relatively speaking, reasons that couldn’t be more innocuous.

‘kay, like I said I didn’t even intend to include those last few sentences, but I couldn’t bring myself to delete them anyway. I’m not sickened this way by many things. I laugh at people who are sickened by such things in such a way. But I don’t know what else to say about this movie. It just made me wanna die, and right now all I wanna do is get any words I have about it published so I can move on. And for the record, I wrote the bulk of this long before this past weekend’s events. Thank God I didn’t watch it after, or I mightn’t be here at all.



I Am Legend

I Am Legend

Thursday, December 27th, 2007

I can only apologise, but again I have to say Kermode pretty much nailed this one in his review. I really didn’t expect this, from what I’d seen and heard, to be a monster movie – the moment he mentioned this aspect of the movie in his review, my interest in the whole thing all but disappeared. It seems so entirely pointless, not only following the obvious 28 Days Later … that he mentioned, but also following unrelated projects like Vanilla Sky and Devil’s Advocate which gave us those frightening vistas of a deserted American city; slightly more related flicks like the recent 30 Days of Night (incidentally, one thing I’d say Kermode and others have got wrong is that if you’re gonna say ‘it’s pretty much a zombie movie even though they’re not zombies’ a la 28 days later … then you may as well count in their aversion to sunlight and fangs too and say it’s actually more like a vampire movie, hence my 30 Days comparison); and End of Days, which at the time of its release seemed to be some kind of consolation for how badly this very project (which was once to be directed by Ridley Scott – why did you do American Gangster instead of this Ridley?!? – and starring, ahem, Arnold Schwartzenegger … no comment …) was going.

For what it is, I can’t deny it has its moments and Will Smith is at his very best, being as he is the only person onscreen for much of the movie. But this is one case where the 90 minute blessing does not apply in the slightest. This movie needed to be longer, it needed to go further. Yet at the same time, I can’t help but remember the long stretches of Smith just wandering around shouting “Anna!” and just how many times did he have to tell her “everyone … is … dead!”? Enough for his voice to metamorphose into Norman Lovett’s in my head, that’s for sure. Even the visual effects – on the creatures side of things, at least – are a disappointment here. Double bill 28 Days Later and iRobot and read the book if you must instead.



The Invasion [2007]

The Invasion [2007]

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

“For better or worse … we’re human again …”

What’s everyone’s beef with this? Invasion of the Body Snatchers is just one of those stories that always works, and this new version, despite all the problems in its making (and yes, they do show – but I do wonder if we’d notice or care so much if certain people didn’t spend as much, if not more, time dwelling on what’s behind-the-scenes as they do on what ends up on the screen), is no exception.

Basically, it had me at “another Body Snatchers remake”, Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, Oliver Hirschbiegel, a really nice John Ottman score and all manner of supporting cast members. I wanted to see this movie. If you think there’s nothing here to love, then you know enough already about your own tastes to not bother watching. But if you think you might quite like it, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed in the slightest.

I think the highest praise I can give it is that I almost accidentally gave it the acid test by watching it today, having only slept a couple of hours this morning … my head was practically dropping off my shoulders during the Olsen twins movies, but by the end of this? I was bolt upright.

The only thing I’d personally complain about is the quite astonishingly conventional car chase and cure-all ending. I’m pretty sure they must’ve shot some kind of ending with a twist (first thing that came to mind for me was the rather obvious thing of the people on the helicopter having fooled her or something) – literally any kind of twist, no matter how corny, would’ve been more satisfying than that simple line I began the review with (don’t get me wrong, it’s a great line, I love it – but like that’s literally the ending of the movie and it’s not enough).

In the end, like all the other versions of the story, it leaves you thinking. It’s one of those movies that makes a frighteningly convincing case about something that we’re meant as “humans” to turn our noses up at. It actually makes you pause and go, “hang on … why not just let them take us?” Well, it did me at least. Perhaps I’ve said too much, lol. I know I wasn’t alone on the whole “wait a sec, Vader is talking perfect sense!” thing in Revenge of the Sith lol … Anyway … Equilibrium kinda did all the emotional deprivation thing a little better, but sometimes there’s room for many deliveries of a similar message and this is one such instance. For me it all comes together in the scene between Kidman and her son, a scene I was really longing to see, when they are both feigning a lack of emotion for fear that the other is “one of them”. Which I’ve found is exactly what far too many of us do for way too much of our time here recently.



Day of the Dead 2: Contagium

Day of the Dead 2: Contagium

Tuesday, December 18th, 2007

I was honestly not nearly as offended by this in the end as I expected. Clearly, I would prefer it had been made by Romero or at least someone involved in the original series of zombie flicks (Tom Savini, perhaps), or not at all. Clearly, the gore effects simply aren’t comparable to anything in Romero’s originals. But, I don’t know … it somehow flows for me, it doesn’t remotely threaten the integrity of the official releases, and it actually tries to do its own thing. Why they thought it necessary to use the Day of the Dead brand is anyone’s guess, except of course the monitary value of it. The abrupt ending is a little weird, too. But compared to what I expected, this was almost a pleasant surprise.



Cabin Fever

Cabin Fever

Sunday, January 4th, 2004

This is one of the funniest horror movies I’ve ever seen. Many will make obvious comparisons to Sam Raimi’s The Evil Dead but I never really got into that whole series for its comedy, it’s more about the gore there. Cabin Fever is also pretty nasty in places, with some similar blood sneezes to 28 Days Later… But where 28 Days Later… was a nasty look at our potential future as a race, Cabin Fever is downright hysterical in places. The best part is, if you’ve heard little about the movie, the comedy really creeps up on you. Early references to Deliverance are near forgotten until the final scene where the movie’s biggest gag is paid off. The line “That’s for niggers,” at first shocks, instills some fear, makes you make assumptions. One of the all-time great misdirections of character. It’s difficult to describe without giving too much away. But if you can sit through gore-fests, this is certainly one you won’t regret renting or buying.