“9/11 … it’s the only thing real that’s ever happened to them.”

There’s something about this, kinda as with Hedwig and the Angry Inch, that made me certain at all turns that I shouldn’t have been loving it as much as I was. I’ve written far too often of how the world at large’s insistence on the binary separation of male and female as something ever-defining etc pisses me off (I mean, Jesus wept, today I had to tell a machine what was between my legs before I could sit in the waiting room at the dentist’s …), and on the whole, this movie (ironically, again like Hedwig) doesn’t have as much leeway on this matter as you’d think it might: in so many of these self-proclaimed open-minded pieces, you’re still either male or female or, if you’re lucky, inbetween – which is great; but ... if you are inbetween in movies like this, you’ve got to be somehow overly extravagant, flamboyant or offensive – I mean, whoever heard of a boring, down-to-earth deviant, right? All that said, as with Hedwig, in this case it works: because, as I’ll say over any cliché thing that should annoy yet doesn’t, the rules don’t apply if such behaviours come from believable characters; and this movie is among the most human I’ve seen.

I still think that anyone who lets sex rule their lives to this degree is really missing out on 10 times as much as I’m sure they’d think I’m missing out on clinging to my virginity … if I met these people in real life, I’d steer clear of them. But, put on film, I don’t know, it’s every bit as much a celebration of life and humanity and finding yourself as Hedwig was. There’s something about having this stuff laid bare in an undeniably artistic (as opposed to pornographic) context that makes it get seriously under your skin with a passion. I personally didn’t find it as explicit as I’d heard; though certainly there are things shown that I’ve never seen in anything so “mainstream”, I feel more offense is likely to be caused by things like the sexualisation of the Statue of Liberty and the shelf of dildos overlooking Ground Zero at the start.

I’ll watch it again if only for its raw beauty. Between this and Hedwig, I’m pretty sure one day John Cameron Mitchell is really gonna wow me – in fact, I have to admit, it’s probably only that hunch and a second viewing keeping this and Hedwig from that elusive 5th heart.

“If only we were among friends! Or … sane persons!”

What a way to start the year this is (okay I watched Hot Fuzz again before it, but didn’t have much to add to the old review, though it did rise significantly up the 2007 list). I don’t think it had ever really occurred to me before, so thanks I guess to ITV for putting it on early yesterday morning

The lyrics are even more incredible than I remember – this is a guy really loving words, like it’s more often than not the sound of the words taking precedence way over any meaning – “I’ll tell you once, I’ll tell you twice / You better wise up, Janet Weiss.” “You’re as sensual as a pencil.” It almost reminds of Tim Rice at his most fun (I know, different people might take that comparison differently; for the record, I love Tim Rice, this is a positive thing I’m saying).

What struck me too on this viewing is how surprisingly clean the movie is. On the sex front it’s as tame as a pantomime, it’s all implied though if you’ve got any hormones whatsoever I’d be shocked if you weren’t turned on at some point – I personally find it just about the sexiest film ever, like, even Tim Curry is somehow a turn-on lol. There’s the fairly shockingly gruesome killing of Eddie but even that’s more in the sound mix than anything else. I guess if you’re offended by words like “transvestite” and “transexual” it might hurt a bit, but really it’s not even as crazy as I thought it was. It only really strikes one as so utterly subversive etc when you’re able to recognise all the symbolism in it like the rainbow colours and the triangle on Frank N Furter’s medical tunic etc.

“It’s not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.”

Ultimately it’s how the ridiculousness of it all just builds and builds (I still remember how much I lost it the first time I watched it that moment when Riff-Raff and Magenta burst in in their alien regalia, lol) only to be cut through by the key line of the whole thing, “Don’t dream it, be it,” and then to cap it all the King Kong reference with Rocky climbing the RKO tower.

I don’t know, sometimes I think I take these things a little too serious considering they are at their core just a little kind of homage or spoof, but, y’know, I always let my heart make the final decision when it comes to movies, and the “Don’t dream it, be it,” and the RKO thing … they really make this movie for me, it’s not just a weird cult entertainment for me, it actually means something. I watched it for the first time almost 10 years ago and if I said it wasn’t at least partly responsible for the things I’ve gradually learned to accept about myself in the years since, may I be struck down for such a giant lie. You can take that last sentence however you want ‘cos I’m still a little averse to being specific. This movie just says how wonderful it is to be yourself and though it almost sounds ridiculous, to not be afraid of things that are pleasing to you. There is simply no better message for a movie to have. If it feels good, why knock it? We badly need another movie like this for today, pronto. I’ll keep my personal detailed ideas on that notion to myself for now

Move aside, Porky’s, lol. This deserves praise for doing pretty much exactly what it says on the tin, to a staggering degree, right from the opening credits. The uniforms, the lettering on the credits, the song, and then … skin … vast quantities of female flesh.

It’s porn cheese city, and there’s very little more to say about it. Like, it’s so much just a porn movie that I found myself considering whether I would even count it as a movie and write about it here. But it has to be said, it’s got something of a story (albeit it most of it rushed through in the last 15 minutes), it’s better shot than most porn I’ve seen, and it has a slight bit of tongue in cheek. Some of the exercise equipment stuff is just inspired.

I just really dug the simplicity and innocence (for want of a better word) of it all. Like Slumber Party Massacre without the massacre or something. It’s probably very exploitative and caters to highly prurient interests (at one point one of the girls dresses in the clothes of her teddy bear, clothes she got when she was 12) ... but I guess I just wanna say, “whatever” to that lol. I found it simple, sexy, and hilarious. Almost instantly a cheesy fave of mine.

This movie is pretty surprising, even shocking. For me personally, it’s a surprise to find a Mischa Barton movie post-Lawn Dogs (which was her debut) where she’s actually interesting on screen. On a broader level, this movie is surprising in that it deals with the normality of a lot of things that are usually considered wrong and rare but are actually pretty common – underage sex, the discovery there-of, and teenage pregnancy, and, shock, horror, parents who really don’t know what they’re doing.

It’s not a great movie, but it’s the best movie that could be made with this subject matter. Jennifer Jason Leigh is surprisingly good, reminded me of Shelley Winters in Kubrick’s Lolita – she plays a character so cheesy, so tacky, so unbelievable, that at first it’s tempting to think it’s just a bad performance. But then you gradually realise, my god… that woman is that chessy and tacky and unbelievable, those people exist.

Mischa Barton suggesting she and another guy try screwing “like horses,” has got to be the highlight of the movie…. it just puts the whole ignorance and innocence thing in a nutshell all at once.

Seriously, this movie makes me wonder just how much of life I missed by being the quiet person at school, LOL.