As with the original Star is Born and the political thrillers mentioned in my Vantage Point review, it’s been too long since I last saw one of the original St. Trinian’s movies for me to make a fair comparison here other than to mention that I know for sure I was a huge fan of them when I was little. I imagine it was one of my early, “I want to be one of them!” experiences even if I didn’t really know it at the time. When Rupert Everett first started talking about his involvement with the new version (a few years ago now I think), I was pretty excited but that excitement ebbed as Mischa Barton first joined the cast, then the whole Girls Aloud involvement, the way it was marketed, and finally the reviews.

Ultimately I came to the movie expecting it to fail on all levels – the nostalgia of the old movies, a re-imagining or modern updating thereof that actually worked, even the slightly dodgy “perv appeal” a lot of the criticism has been aimed at. To my astonishment, I enjoyed every second of it and I imagine it’s a movie that I will wind up watching far too many times for my own good in the future. It works on all of the levels mentioned above and then some. No, it’s not going to win any awards. But though it mightn’t seem like it sometimes, I do enjoy a little pure entertainment from time to time; and this is the kind of thing that for me fits the bill. It couldn’t have been better.

I feel luckier than most of those who’ve been disappointed by this one by the fact that my interest in it lay pretty much solely in AnnaSophia Robb’s appearance in it, and I found out how small her role was when I saw the trailer months ago. It’s smaller still than that, in fact … but at least I was prepared. The worrying thing to me about her presence here was how young she looked – like, just how long ago was this thing shot?! ‘cos right now, even around the time Bridge to Terabithia shot, I’m sure she could almost quite easily have played the older, more prominent, Millie. (this article suggests they shot August 2006 … I guess AS is just good at dressing older more recently, lol).

As to the movie – well, it’s as slick as the trailer looked, and I think the key lies in realising the rather dreary thing the movie is saying, and it’s something we’ve all wondered from time to time if we’ve ever thought about having a superpower and which one we’d choose etc; would we really use it to help people like Superman etc? Or would we just keep it to ourselves and peep on people in the shower (ahem)? But while this would seem to be a unique and pertinent, especially at this point in time, subject for a movie, it turns out to be pretty unexciting in the end.

I think the only thing that could maybe have made it better is if they cut out the time lag and cast a younger guy as the hero, keeping AnnaSophia in the Millie part (really, this is not just the AnnaSophia fan in me saying this lol). You can imagine younger teenagers acting this way, even as far as “acting older” like Leonardo DiCaprio in Catch Me If You Can. When it’s Hayden Christensen and Rachel Bilson … it’s just kinda pathetic. Also nobody should ever let Jamie Bell use his regular voice in a movie, ever again. I figured it might’ve worked here in the short clips I’d seen, being as it almost makes sense if he’s never stayed in one place most his life … but basically, the movie’s just not good enough for me to be that considerate over it.

The scene where Christensen finally reveals to Bilson his little quirk is quite the ultimate case in point as to why this movie is so far from realising its potential. He dances around the issue in a stupidly comic way, Samuel Jackson right outside the front door seconds away from killing them both; and when he finally shows her, her acting ability is revealed in all its hopeless glory as she “reacts” to seeing a human being defy the laws of time and space before her very eyes.

Having only seen 3 movies so far from this year (including this), I really thought this would be the one that made it feel like the year had begun. As it is, though the other two (Rambo and Day of the Dead) were no masterpieces either, I’d certainly watch them again much sooner than this one, which told me all I needed to know in one go and left me simply wanting to shout, “Next?”

On the plus side the visuals are good (Egypt in particular – Bucket List losers take note lol) as are the exotic locations. I guess they make up for the criminal underuse of AnnaSophia. But we’re still left with a gaping hole of a movie. That it ends an hour too soon (not that I’d want another hour; but seriously, no ending in movies has ever made me think “That’s it?!” so loudly) is just insult to injury … and that Christensen doesn’t even learn anything by the movie’s close is just … grr, can you just tell that I’d rant about this for days if I had the time? I guess there’ll be a sequel … I mean god, if White Noise got one … I won’t even be rushing to download that … unless it’s AnnaSophia.

After Big Nothing – in fact, possibly before that (my initial anticipation for Hot Fuzz wasn’t that huge) – even Simon Pegg couldn’t help this one from looking like yet another of those rushed British comedies I really thought we’d seen the back of years ago. It’s essentially The Full Monty with running and a dash of Rocky; it’s severely overloaded with Britcom stars (the David Walliams “Mr. Man” from Little Britain in Thandie Newton’s bakery is about the most cringeworthy … plenty others come close though), it’s shot in 2.35:1 ratio for no good reason (one of my biggest movie hangups), and the prospective stepfather plot with Hank Azaria is about as thoughtless as that in All I Want for Christmas, right down to the final, “Hang on, he hasn’t actually done anything wrong yet, besides being willing to step in for a single mother, has he? Let’s make him swear at the kid!” moment.

But what can I say, none of these things really detract from the general sense of fun throughout – Dylan Moran being one of the Britcom peeps who never annoys (“Come on up!” LOL might be my favourite final shot of the past year; it’s certainly the funniest) and the final marathon sequence, built around a beautiful image of Pegg “hitting the wall” ... my heart just went with it entirely and there were more than a couple of tears in my eyes for him. I just realised looking at the IMDb that David Schwimmer directed it – I’m sure I knew this already but it’d slipped my mind. See, this is what I meant on Gone Baby Gone about a movie exceeding the director’s name. I’d be interested in seeing more from him.

It’s taken me a long time but I’m finally, slowly, recently coming to the realisation that I really just don’t like Ridley Scott in general – that is, that the movies of his that I tend to love … and yes, when I like a Ridley Scott movie, I really like it … they always tend to be the ones that everyone else see as failures for him. Of the hits, only Thelma and Louise stands out for me – I’m still working through the Blade Runner Final Cut set hoping for an epiphany but it’s not looking good – add Hannibal and Matchstick Men and that’s about it for me.

With those last two in mind, particularly Matchstick Men, I actually looked forward to seeing this one, because it seemed to fit the magic mould. I’d much prefer to see Scott applying his technical sheen to a loopy, down to earth story like this than anything he did in Gladiator, American Gangster, and worst of all Kingdom of Heaven. The same goes for Russell Crowe – I don’t give a damn about the accent, I’d much prefer to see him as loose as he is here than his more commercially successful man act … I mean he truly glows in places of this movie, you can feel the France getting to him like it gets to anyone.

In short, I was far from let down. In fact, I barely stopped laughing for the whole movie. It’s barely got a thing to say worth saying, but like Matchstick Men it’s just an undeniably talented director (yeh, don’t get me wrong – I just don’t like most of his movies lol) letting rip on a story completely unworthy of that talent; and to me, the product is far more desirable than any of his more “worthy” feats. You can practically feel the breeze and smell the twilight air in some scenes here, rustic France probably hasn’t looked so inviting since Jean De Florette and Manon des Sources. The soundtrack is random as hell, the girls are beautiful, the wine’s surprisingly, hilariously rotten … what can I say but I’ll be coming back for more of this one for sure.

I had a feeling this would be better a second time, but I don’t know where to begin describing the sensation I felt walking home today. Sometimes, just sometimes, it’s really worth seeing a movie on the largest screen you can find. I’m sure that’s the opposite of what I’ve said elsewhere but hey, I’m saying it.

I had my eyes on Johnny Depp for pretty much the whole movie this time – projected larger than life his performance is even more outstanding than I’d first thought, and though I’d pretty much been swung over to the Daniel Day Lewis camp earlier today seeing some clips from There Will Be Blood, I couldn’t have swung back harder or faster. It’s not just the singing and the face and the accent; what captivated me more than anything here were the full-length shots of Johnny … the way he walks and carries himself, he’s like a silent movie star, it’s all Sweeney and though he’s on the screen almost constantly, I wanted even more of him just standing, brooding.

On occasion my gaze did shift, though, to the other actors; particularly Helena Bonham-Carter, who is also much better than I’d previously thought … watching her just through the “Not While I’m Around” scene, right up to her closing the door on Toby in the bakehouse, is just about as mesmerising and gutwrenching as watching Depp for the rest of the film’s duration.

It is slightly more violent than I’d perceived the first time around (though I’d still stand by what I said about the BBFC – and I was glad to hear Mark Kermode saying much the same a couple of weeks ago on Five Live), but as many have said already, it borders about as much on the ridiculously comic as it’s possible to do without veering completely into nonsense and making a mockery of the rest of the drama; the roll-on effect being that when those crucial deaths occur in the final act, your focus is entirely on the higher meaning of the deaths, and about as far removed from the shower of blood as I think has ever been seen in such a bloody movie.

I didn’t spot Anthony Head’s brief appearance the first time either – it’s truly blink and you’ll miss it, lol. I think he was originally to be one of those who sang “The Ballad of Sweeney Todd” – which I guess I also want to mention again. I’ve grown to love this exclusion – it’s beautiful as underscore and really, as I said in the earlier review, I missed “Kiss Me” much more than anything else. And even that exclusion is still a minor drawback, which along with the slightly hokey, “That’s all very well …” line following “Epiphany” (it’s in the trailer too), is far from enough to counter the fact that this movie is really, quite jawdroppingly, perfect.

7th January, 2008:

NB. I’ve decided to post this now, it’s been sort of hanging back till I see it “properly” ‘cos, as with Rent, my opinion after a first watch felt very muddled but having listened to the soundtrack again the other night, I remembered the one reason I think it really is as good as I wanted it to be and that’s that, basically, it reaches that same crushingly beautiful hollow in the end that I remember from the first time I saw the show / listened to the cast recordings / whatever. I can’t wait to see it again, definitely a birthday present to look forward to
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I can’t begin this review without pointing out how ultimately I couldn’t help but approach it on a first viewing the same way I did the Rent movie. It felt almost like a chore, like, I almost just wanted to get the watching of it “out of the way” so I could watch it again if that makes any sense. I wanted to know what was missing, what was new, what was changed, etc, so I could amend my perspective or whatever to get the most out of it. Subsequent viewings of movies like this will always be more enjoyable than the first for me – I don’t like unpleasant surprises much Not that there are many here, I hasten to add (the clue is in the star rating if I start to sound like I was disappointed).

I guess I’m surprised now having seen it how universal the praise has been. It’s by no means as conventional an adaptation as they could’ve made it, and the cuts are just as unexpected (“Green Finch and Linnet Bird”, to my joy, remains; while “The Ballad” is used only for instrumental underscore). I love how young Toby is now and Ed Sanders, who plays him, is incredible in the part. And while I’m on the supporting cast I may as well mention Sacha Baron Cohen as Pirelli … even more perfect than I imagined he’d be.

Then there’s the gore. I’m baffled and a little annoyed by having just read that it has been rated ‘18’ here in the UK. To me it makes little sense – even if it’d actually been as violent as I’d been led to expect (which it isn’t) ... there is no sex (even the beggar woman’s bawdy taunts are gone – though they’re there on the soundtrack …), no bad language (*edit*: okay, the “s” word but that’s still PG material …), nothing but blood here for the BBFC to be offended by. And though the ‘18’ certificate isn’t quite the kiss of death the NC-17 rating is in the US, I still think that stopping under-18s from seeing a movie like this … I mean it’s Sondheim for heck’s sake … it sends out the wrong message entirely about what the BBFC’s purpose is. I hope a few councils think to overrule it and let a few school trips get in or something.

Of course, I can’t end this review without mentioning Johnny Depp I’d seen bits and pieces of the performance and couldn’t resist sneaking a few tracks of the soundtrack prior to watching the movie, and I knew that the gruff bellowing rage of George Hearn etc was pretty much gone, replaced with Depp’s beautiful but admittedly thin voice. In the context of the whole product, though, there’s far more surprises in his singing than I expected. He actually does come close to the roar of the stage Sweeneys in places, and when he holds the soaring, swooping higher notes, especially alongside Alan Rickman on “Pretty Women”, it’s absolute heaven. The harmonising on the part of the other actors is really impressive too.

See, kind of a flat review and I’m afraid I might sound like I was slightly bored by the movie. Like I said, it was the first look. My anticipation for this movie was massive, I pretty much knew how much I was going to love it. It’s been like a present sitting under the Christmas tree, like I know what it is, I really want it, and now I’ve opened it I’m just looking forward to playing with it again later. If that makes any sense, lol.

One thing I will say is that despite all the buzz etc, and I’ll be continuing my little corner of support for it, I’d be astonished if this was nominated for a lot of Oscars let alone winning any – I keep seeing other hopefuls and just about everytime I find another category I feel Sweeney will be shut out of … even Johnny in the end. It just really doesn’t strike me as that kind of movie, not from any angle I look at it, and there are so many other movies that, no matter what I think, are gonna get a hell of a lot more votes. Like I said – don’t get me wrong, I love it – I’m just kinda surprised that so many other people do too. It seems so grey and grim to me to be getting such love as it is. I feel like they could’ve used the crossover aspects better – the Sondheim fans, the Johnny fans, the gore hounds – they could’ve made it 2 and a half hours, they could’ve really used the Johnnyness, and despite what people are saying .. it could be gorier.

Yes – I’m giving it 5 stars, it’s at the top of my 2007 list, and I’m sitting here saying it could’ve been better, lol. But, like Rent was still “Rent”, y’know: it’s still “Sweeney Todd”. It might not be as definitive a version of the show as I’d hoped for – it feels a little too fast in places jumping from scene to scene (“Kiss Me” would’ve been a particularly helpful inclusion I think towards the end) but it still knocks the socks off anything else seen in the past year. All I can think could be the reason for its success is the thought of those who have never seen or heard of Sweeney Todd. When I think of those people, I almost literally turn green with envy. I guess going into this movie that way, as perhaps many have … that would be a pretty astonishing experience … which is exactly why I’ll be taking the family for my birthday “thing” in February

Hmm. Like American Gangster and 3:10 to Yuma before it this year, I can’t help feeling disappointed here. From the director of Crash, A History of Violence, the writer of Dirty Pretty Things, and the exuberent praise of Mark Kermode, I’ve gotta say I really expected more from this. A second viewing might prove me wrong, but I haven’t even got round to a second viewing of “History” and I still know that movie was better – most particular in the visuals department. London just looks drab here, and not in any kind of way that it’s pertinent to the plot. Just about everybody involved here has done better work, and even the already infamous steam room scene isn’t that impressive. At 90 minutes I’m bound to watch it again before Oscar time, particularly if it’s nominated for anything … though that would really surprise me.

There’s a lot about this Olsen Twins movie that makes it better than most, though not quite as polished as New York Minute. Again, the story is very similar, though there does seem to be more reason for their visit to London than rich parents who just want them out of the way: this time it’s a school trip, a model United Nations conference. The main Cute Guy^TM is played by Jesse Spencer, who I instantly recognised from somewhere – he looks a lot like Ryan Philippe, in fact – and a quick look at the IMDb shows he used to play Billy in Neighbours, and was the British rock singer in Uptown Girls. Though his British accent, like all the accents, attitudes, etc in this movie, is highly stylised (this London is the Movie London where everyone either speaks Posh or Cockney, where everyone drinks tea, and nobody in their right mind calls the bathroom anything but “the loo”...), he’s actually a pretty good actor and he makes that tough aspect of all Olsen Twins movies a little easier to sit through.

Also very cool is a small subplot with the characters dubbed “the third wheels” – the minor characters making up the Twins’ school team – and a cute little romance that develops between two of them. They sort of reminded me of Lindsay Lohan’s brilliant friends in Mean Girls. There’s also a very funny scene towards the end that you would expect must have been done before in a more respectable romantic comedy: one Twin is expecting to meet the Cute Guy^TM in front of Buckingham Palace; while standing next to one of the guards she mutters to herself about his not showing, and then walks away; later, the Cute Guy^TM appears next to the same guard, “I know you can’t talk… but did you see this girl…?” and the guard suddenly sharply turns his head with this urgent look in his eyes. The movie has a great soundtrack, too. Not bad at all.