I guess I’ve changed since my last review. You can’t overlook the overwhelming darkness of this movie with the usual, cynical, “oh, they so totally Disnified it,” comment on the ending. This is probably the darkest children’s movie ever made, referring so frequently as it does to the very bowels of hell, sins of the flesh, ugliness, blood and fire, all to the almost Omen-esque tones of Alan Menken’s score, one of his very best, and Stephen Schwartz’ irresistible lyrics. Even the lightest song referred to below, “Guy Like You,” contains an image of hanging marionettes. It’s thick with the grisliest aspects of humanity and if all Disney needed to do to justify all this was let Esmerelda live, then so be it as far as I’m concerned now.

December 27th, 2004:

This is a way better movie than a lot of Disney’s stuff that came later, but no where near as good as I originally thought. It does have scene after scene of haunting music and images: from “The Bells of Notre Dame” to “Out There” to the ultimate bad guy showstopper, “Beata Maria / Hellfire”, Alan Menken’s score and Stephen Schwartz’s lyrics are a treasure, overlooked at the Oscars (not even a song nomination, it’s sacrilege). Even the standard ‘Hakuna Matata’ ish “A Guy Like You” is fantastic (how can you not love a song that begins, “Paris, the city of lovers, is glowing this evening – / True, that’s because it’s on fire, but still there’s l’amour…”)

Where Hunchback stumbles, aside from comparisons to the classic 1939 movie which is simply irreplacable, is perhaps a result of all the gloriously heavy scenes. I guess, being a Disney movie, they had to balance it with something for the kids. I actually don’t mind some of the humour, it’s not too bad sometimes, but it’s too much of a contrast, I’d rather have an all-out gothic madness fest. And of course, Esmerelda doesn’t stay dead, which bugs me a lot – and I’m somebody who didn’t mind the absurd alterations Disney made to The Little Mermaid etc. It’s not necessarily the fact she doesn’t stay dead – it’s more the fact that it looks like she’s going to, and then it looks like somebody at Disney said, “Well, we can’t have her re-animated with a kiss, that’ll be just like Sleeping Beauty and Snow White and oh, everything that worked… so how can we get her back in action?” and some cleaning lady or vending machine filler passing by suggests, “She could just stand up in the background?”

However, after the disappointment of this PC gloss-job, Disney do have at least one superb emotional pay-off at the end. I never fail to cry when that little girl comes out of the crowd and the ‘camera’ pans so slowly around them as Quasimodo finally sees a glimmer of hope in the world around him.

I really wasn’t too excited about this one following the less than engrossing Cars. Even though I love food, I love cooking food, I love watching people cook; it seemed like an even stranger start-point for a Pixar movie than the last one. However, for at least the first hour here, I was completely enraptured by the smoother-than-ever animation, the truly humble voicework; and when the food started being thrown around, in the gorgeously rendered digital Paris? Let’s just say this one certainly has more than its share of moments that more than match the best parts of the Toy Stories, Finding Nemo, and Monsters Inc.

It’s not without its flaws. I didn’t really buy the whole Remy-controlling-Linguine thing, it got a little annoying at times. And I don’t mean like, I have problems suspending my disbelief kind of way – it’s just, alongside the much more subtle, even beautiful, way the unlikely pair first communicate, it’s just that bit too farfetched by comparison. Like Cars, too, it’s certainly a little overlong, and there’s a good slog in the second half that had me squirming a little for something to happen.

But then there’s all the good. I loved the vertically challenged head chef – everytime he thought he’d seen a rat he totally reminded me of Herbert Lom in the Pink Panther movies, and a quick Google search tells me I’m not alone in noticing this. Michael Giacchino’s score is sheer perfection, way better than his work on The Incredibles which I personally wasn’t as overwhelmed by as some.

Overall, this is a step up for Pixar following Cars, that’s for sure. It’s a movie I will certainly watch more than a few times again, and I think the highest praise from me must be that I won’t be too crushed if it beats out Meet the Robinsons at next year’s Oscars for the Best Animated Feature award. I only wish there’d been more of the digital Paris. They could’ve almost just had a virtual camera roaming the streets of that model for 2 hours to Giacchino’s music and I would’ve been in heaven.

I was never particularly overwhelmed by either of the first movies in this series, and to me this felt mostly like just as unobjectionable a time-passer – plenty of big laughs, not much to tie them all together. But as I warmed back to this world – one I’ve never really liked as much as those dreamed up by Disney, Pixar, even Walden Media – I have to say, I found myself enjoying this the most by far out of all the movies to date; and by the end, I was even looking forward to the next one for once.

I did find myself wondering how entertained younger kids would be by it though – it seemed too often that they’ve forgotten who the main audience is. Am I the only person who was more than a little disturbed by the oh-so-hilarious death scene of Fiona’s father followed by a funeral scene accompanied by the song “Live and Let Die”? I don’t know, I found that whole scene very misguided. I mean, I can understand trying to see the light side of such things, but this just struck me like a mockery, and all I could imagine was some poor kid bursting into laughter at a grandparent or somebody’s hospital bed because his or her death throes so much resemble the cute little fwoggy. I don’t know, even as I type that I know how stupid it sounds, but it just struck me as really strange and unsettling, and few things do so I’m mentioning it. Luckily, the movie gets much better after that. I loved the whole college sequence (“How can you be a reciever of the wedgies, when you are clearly not a wearer of the underpants?”)

I’d totally forgotten how fantastic this movie was – I thought it was all about Jessie and the “When She Loved Me” sequence for me, but everything that surrounds those (I have to say) highlights is more frenetic, hysterical (“It’s the chicken man!” “Look, Barbie – a big ugly man doll!” lol), and, even on an umpteenth viewing, still shockingly more poignant than I ever expect.

But like I said, this movie kind of needs go no further for me than the character of Jessie – there are little quirks here like the kinda-half-dance she does on the turntable after she gets the hang of the motion, the pulling-her-hat-down-over-her head thing, that just touch me somewhere that an animated doll in all reason shouldn’t be able to touch, lol – and the whole “When She Loved Me” sequence, Emily growing, the horses turning to nail polish, that is one of the most beautiful, crushing, painfully truthful 3 minutes Pixar have ever produced … I think maybe it got me even more today because it’s been a long time not only since I watched the movie but even longer since I watched it alone, and it’s one of those sequences, you just wanna be alone, curled up in the dark, crying to that song. I do, anyway. But there’s always the thrilling climax and all the other wonderful stuff I’m too lazy to mention if that isn’t your thing This is just a beautiful movie that takes my breath away every time.

I had basically two reasons to hate this movie – 1) the animation – I mean need I say more, this is probably the worst “at a glance” looking movie of the century … when Red Riding Hood says at the start, “Your face looks a little weird, gramma,” I almost couldn’t resist the urge to say, “Uh … you’re not looking too hot yourself, Red …” and 2) y’know what? I don’t want to see Little Red Riding Hood all pimped out and updated etc. I like that Little Red Riding Hood is one of the few perfect embodiments of innocence in the world of fiction. The Christina Ricci “caca” version (which I really wish I could find again, any suggestions?) was about as far as I can take it and that was only by virtue of that version’s sheer oddness.

But, anyway, it’s the same old story – I’ve lost count of how many animated movies have looked horrendous to me over the past couple of years before I saw them, and only Barnyard has so far really delivered on the rottenness stakes. This movie is surprisingly watchable, the animation ultimately sits together surprisingly well, and in fact, sometimes some of the textures are pretty damn impressive considering the obvious limitations these guys had. The lighting is pretty nice, too. And that old innocence is definitely there enough for me – Red’s song at the beginning is one beautifully cheesy moment.

Suddenly I feel like I’m excusing the movie, like, “actually it was awful but I just feel so bad kicking it …” but really, that’s not what I mean. This is probably one of the best non Pixar/Disney/Dreamworks animations I’ve seen and at 80 minutes, it’s really not worth complaining about for the way it fills the time.

Speaking of jarringly bizarre endings ... the ending to this one actually somehow didn’t spoil the movie for me as much as it has for many. Moulin Rouge, March of the Penguins, An Inconvenient Truth and A.i. might sound like a weird combo – but that’s what Happy Feet is, and it’s even weirder than that. I think it might also be the best movie I’ve seen from 2006. It contains some of the best animation I’ve seen since Finding Nemo, some hilarious lines courtesy of Robin Williams, and made me want to do something about the “whole environment thing” about a million times more than Al Gore’s little lecture did. And I don’t know how it did this – it just reached in and touched my heart and left me wondering how the hell it got in there in the first place. I’ll really have to see it again to make sense of my own response to this wonderful movie. I thought nothing could beat Monster House in the animation genre last year – but this one beats everything back into the water.

I’ll have to grab this on DVD some time since the cut I saw today (on Disney’s own UK channel Cinemagic, for shame) was one of the ridiculously shortened cuts with over half an hour missing. If this includes the song “Candle on the Water” then it’s downright criminal – was this song sung in the movie, anyone? It certainly wasn’t in this cut anyway, brings new meaning to the word “butchered” if it’s supposed to be there, lol.

Anyway.

I’ve almost certainly seen this movie before, but probably before my longterm memory kicked in. That this movie’s story is so beautiful, and young Sean Marshall’s performance so brilliant, that it overcomes the deficiencies in the live-action/animation combo effects is really saying something. The songs are fantastic, instantly bring a smile and a tear to my face. And what a supporting cast with Shelley Winters and Mickey Rooney on the sidelines.

Make this one of the first movies your kids see before they become too jaded to forgive the visuals. Or just curl up with a cuddly toy and hot chocolate and be a kid yourself again for a couple of hours. Double bill it with The Iron Giant.

Addendum: Should’ve looked here first, but anyway, the movie’s page on Wikipedia contains info on the different cuts, and “Candle on the Water” was indeed cut for the shorter versions. I’ve really never gone with the idea of Disney as an Evil Empire … but this is seriously seriously wrong Make sure you get the right cut when you watch it … I’m gonna be getting the DVD ASAP and probably giving it 5 stars ‘cos even in this wrecked form it perked my mood immeasurably.

You can’t go wrong with Disney, and this is one of my favourites. I love how this one requires such suspension of disbelief – really an astonishing amount when you step back from it and take a look. Like, normally, you’re asked to believe in a magic flying carpet or a fairy godmother – simple, magical stuff. Here it’s mostly based in reality, and you’re being asked almost (for most people) to subscribe to a whole new set of beliefs. It’s said outright at one point by Grandmother Willow, “there are spirits, all around,” and that Pocahontas’ mother lives in the wind, etc. I’m 99% certain there are probably comments and messages on the IMDb with dummies saying how dumb it is that a bunch of Lucky Charms fly through the air and suddenly a Native American and an Englishman can have a civilised conversation, lol. But that’s not how this movie works. In order to fully enjoy it, it’s almost like you’re forced to look past what’s actually happening on the screen and instead figure out what it means. Or you can just laugh at Flit and Meeko, I guess, your choice.

Even the smallest thing says so much – for example, the way Meeko bites John Smith’s gold coin when he’s trying to demonstrate to Pocahontas what the explorers are looking for and tossing it aside, it’s just a whole sudden simple perspective on the situation, like an innocent child suddenly saying the most random thing and making so much sense. Meeko wants a biscuit, that’s what’s important to him, he doesn’t want some stupid shiny thing.

What I found pretty weird on this viewing is how much the film still resonates with real world events – and probably moreso than it did in 1995. We could really kinda use a movie like this these days, where did ya go, Disney? I couldn’t help watching this time and seeing a lot of Dubya in the character of Radcliffe, always looking for a fight, always looking for what is simply not there, and the reprise of “Savages” is such a perfect representation of the blur that exists between hatred and pure insanity.

I was glad I could find the old theatrical version on the new DVD for this viewing: it’s awkwardly hidden in the “set-up” menu where you’d normally find commentaries etc – this actually makes a lot of sense, but in the past Disney have usually let you choose the alternate versions after you select the “Play” option from the main menu. I really don’t like how they’ve added “If I Never Knew You” to the movie. I don’t mind the first instance, since, like “Human Again” in Beauty and the Beast, it stands alone, and it’s certainly interesting to hear Mel Gibson sing. But it’s the reprise that bugs me. It interrupts one of my all-time favourite movie music cues, “Farewell,” which begins when you first see John Smith by the water waiting to be shipped home and runs right up till the end credits. It doesn’t need that reprise halfway through and for me, the reprise ruins the whole sequence. The theatrical cut is certainly the best.