Oh lordy. Couldn’t be happier I didn’t waste time squeezing this one in on Halloween, lol. This is hideously written, hideously scored, and has some really weird (and I know this’ll sound weird coming from me) sexual stuff involving schoolkids, camera lingering on the cheerleaders etc – and we’re not talking like ridiculously overaged actors playing the parts – one of the teachers says something at the start about ogling the young filly or something? ... and then the youngest of the siblings playing strip poker? “No more naked girls for you! You’re only 5!” followed by the creepiest child wink I’ve ever seen, lol … seriously, there’s some really strange stuff in here. If you complained about Bratz then you really owe it to yourself to see just how much more “inappropriate” children’s entertainment can be. When it almost offends me, that’s when you need to start panicking. This is even before the crap Austin Powers shows up and changes the movie from creepy to perverific.

I watched it for Taylor Dooley, and she’s good, the best thing in the movie, etc, but luckily I’m not fan enough of hers to really ever get the urge to watch it again. But this is ultimately the cheesy kind of TV movie that does nothing but make me mad. One IMDb reviewer put it as, “Your kids deserve better,” which is close; I won’t try to put it my way, because I’ll end up sounding like a raving lunatic. In short, it’s so sub-par it’s practically evidence of functioning evil in the world. That people waste time on sh*t like this and get paid is just a sham. Sorry, Taylor. You deserve better. But you do look cute as a cat (or whatever that costume’s supposed to be, rofl).

This entry was posted on Sunday, November 4th, 2007 at 6:30 pm in 1 heart, Movie Reviews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.